In the distance I can see the faint outlines of the corner I'm hoping to turn.

Things finally seem to be coming together, and it's in that release of pressure that I realize how hard I've been working these last few weeks. It's like I've been pulling and tugging, physically dragging this family into a new road, a new place for us. There's been so much to adjust to, and with the husband gone I've been the only person here who could make sure everything happened as it needed to.

I've never before had to maintain this degree of control over myself. The teen is continually poised at the edge of the cliff; the least exhibition of frustration or anger sends him off into reactionary fits of self-defense. If I fail to project complete calm in both tone and body language in every interaction with him and his sisters, he will react with everything from sullen withdrawal to outbursts of rage.

He has pushed and pushed and pushed at me, and I didn't even realize until tonight I was being tested.

Each time we've had a fight, I have taken the time to regain control of my emotions, then insisted on talking calmly with him until we resolved the situation. I have kept insisting that it's OK to be mad at each other and that I still love him. I have also made a point of sincerely apologizing for anything I have needed to apologize for.

The last couple of days, something has changed in him. I don't dare believe that he's turned a corner in trusting me, but he has temporarily stopped trying to push my buttons. He hasn't gone into any diatribes about how mistreated he is and how awful it is to be here, he has actually eaten two dinners in a row without complaining about how awful they are, and he has not only done his homework he did it without needing to be reminding more than about five times. He even responded with a smile to my tactful reminders and was cheerful while he worked on his English paper. Most astonishing of all, he confided in me his concerns about his upcoming Economics final.

Nor is he the only one acting happier. The toddler has suddenly dropped from averaging a temper tantrum once or twice an hour to only three or four a day. She helps me cheerfully with the baby, even trying to share her favorite toys with her little sister in an attempt to calm her down. She's more obedient, and is happy and smiling in a way I haven't seen in months. With her I am daring to hope things might continue to improve, because I think this is developmental.

We've got a long way to go yet, but I think, maybe, we're starting to gel. (Now we just need to survive the move, the new home, the new church, the new school, the new neighbors ...)

I'm feeling a little bit triumphant right now.