Family Secrets

The husband's first wife called tonight and we had a nice chat. Have I mentioned before that I'm the husband's third wife? The first was a teenage elopement that fell apart almost as fast as it happened; they're still friends and she was friendly to me from the beginning.

His second marriage was the one to the teen's mom. That lasted a decade and a half only to fall apart after he retired. He was gone so much that the problems they had never had a chance to come to the surface. A couple of years of being home full time had them barely speaking to each other. By the time the divorce was finalized they were so entrenched in their anger that it's only in the last couple of years they've been able to work together for the teen without any discussion degenerating into shouting and slammed phones.

I like to tease the husband that I'm his midlife crisis wife. It's only funny because I'm a long way from blonde and skinny. We met online, through a penpal service. I'd wanted a penpal ever since I was a kid, but never knew how to go about getting one. When I finally got online it was for the express purpose of getting penpals. We knew each other for a year before we met, but we were in love for months prior to our first face to face.

The husband doesn't like people to know he was divorced twice. He feels badly about it, and if you just hear the bald facts, yeah, it does sound bad. But once you know the details it's no big deal.

Of course, I say that, but I still haven't ever told my family I'm a third wife ...