I'm a mom. I don't need no stinkin' sleep.

When I was pregnant with the preschooler I heard a lot about how the reason pregnant women have a hard time sleeping, especially in the last trimester, is that their bodies are preparing them for the lack of sleep that comes with having a newborn. Even my doctor told me that.

As if anything could prepare you for that.

It was a real shock to me. I'd thought it through before she was born and figured, OK, how hard can it be? She needs to eat every two hours, so that's two hours of sleep at a time, all day long. Oh, I'll be fine! I'll be a little sleep-deprived, sure, but nothing I can't handle.

I think we all know how bad my math skills are.

Of course, if you've ever cared for a newborn you understand (as I did not) that it isn't two hours from the end of one feeding to the beginning of the next. No, it's two hours from the beginning of one to the beginning of the next. Since the preschooler would take at least 20 minutes to eat at first, sometimes 30, it added up to precious little sleep. Eight one hour naps do not equal one eight hour sleep cycle. They just don't. Take my word for it.

The first few weeks with both of my daughters is just a blurry memory of nursing and waking up to a hungry baby.

While I am sad we will not be having any more children, I am rather glad not to be going through all that again.

Just thinking about this right now because the baby woke up for some reason at 2:30 and wouldn't go back to sleep until 6. When the preschooler woke up.

Anybody got a diet Mountain Dew?