If you say it, does that make it true?

I've got a chance to write a column, maybe, for a magazine that is fairly major among one of my major interests. Yeah, I know, pretty roundabout, but I don't want to mess this up for myself by saying too much.

I wrote a letter to the editor, and the editor wrote back and asked me if I would be interested in writing an article on the topic I wrote the letter about. I, of course, jumped on the chance, writing back and asking what slant she wanted and how long? Her response was that I should come up with several ideas and if the first one worked then we'd do more.

So now I'm so excited that I can't write. Gotta love writer's block. It'll slap you upside the head every time, won't it?

I really think I can do something good here. Something not just about my career and supporting my family, but a chance to do something to help people and do some good. I feel really good about this on one level, very calm and certain. The rest of me, though, is hyperventilating and can't think what to say. But I was able to come up with 48 column ideas, so I'm not completely blocked. It's just my perfectionism getting in the way. I need to let go of that, take a deep breath, and dive in. I know I can do it. I've done it before. I can do it now. It's nothing new, except for the topic. (It's always easier writing on topics I'm not passionate about.)

Interesting side note here: I think I got the offer because of a site I mentioned in the letter, one I put together on this subject several years ago. It's not a big site and infrequently updated (not neglect, just the nature of the topic) but it's the only thing I can think of that would have given her an idea of my writing. (My original letter was pretty short.) So, who knows where things you put together without thinking about it too much, might lead?

I want to do this. I can do this. I want to do good and make a difference and help people. (And, waxing religious here,) God sent me this opportunity and that wouldn't have happened if I couldn't do it. I just need to take a big breath, close my eyes, and step into the darkness, trusting the light will move with me to illuminate my way. It will. I know it will.

I can do this.
I can do this.
I can do this.